I’ve given this way to much thought over the past few months and I’ve come to the conclusion that going unnoticed is not only undesirable but its also bloody difficult for a number of reasons.
First off, going unnoticed depends on what you’re wearing. You arent going to go unnoticed in 4 inch heels and a bright red dress!
You might do at a drag queen conference but in the middle of a small English town then you are going to stand out like a sore thumb. This however might just be what you want 😀
Secondly, going unnoticed is quite difficult especially if you’re Trans as you probably dress better than most women dress on a day to day basis. (I’m writing this while sat in my local Cafe having breakfast and of the three women in in here I am the best dressed. One is wearing her pyjamas (yep!), one is wearing joggers and a top and i’m wearing a fluffy pink sweater and a denim skirt).
I like to make an effort to get dressed everyday and lots of women don’t. Same with men I know. Not being rude Ladies and Gentlemen, just a stark observation.
Thirdly, going unnoticed is hard if you have more prominent male features. For example, a pronounced adam’s apple, wide shoulder or large hands/feet.
Again I am quite lucky in this regard and have small hands and feet and no noticable Adam’s apple.
Most time I dont want to go un-noticed.
Let me explain this, as this is where it gets deep.
I’ve invested a lot of time, effort and money in my appearance and I want to be noticed for my style and appearance. I dont necassarily want to be noticed as “a man in a dress” and thats why I spend time and effort on my appearance.
My make up is stop on everytime I leave the house and I dress nicely. Not, Over the top.
I am also not after the adorning glances of men, or women for that matter. I want to be noticed for my style and look and no other reason. I want to engage with people and talk to people. If I went unnoticed this is difficult.
I also dress for the occasion. Night out in Manchester or a special event and I want to be noticed. Work in Macclesfield and i’m dressing down a bit to blend in. However not to much as I dont want to be a wall flower.
Its bloody hard to go unnoticed so go with what you are comfy with, dress how you want and dont let anyone tell you otherwise,