Yet again another human being has let me down and you know what I’m really angry.
I’m not angry with the other person, I’m angry with myself, for letting them inside my mental fortress again.
I promised myself, after the last one, that I wouldn’t do it. I have my closed circle of friends and I let somebody new inside and they’ve hurt me really badly and while I’m upset that they’ve done this to me, I cannot explain the anger inside me at this moment.
I’m angry that I’ve let somebody else into my life who I loved and cared about.
My trouble is I’m too trusting a person. I can’t help myself it’s in my nature, and the after last time I vowed I’d never let anybody make me feel like this.
I have let myself down and that is why I’m angry!
Especially angry because I trusted this person and yet here we are again with me feeling betrayal and to some extent helpless with my emotions!
Never again will I let anybody else into my life in that way again!
My trust is to be earnt these days and not given freely.
I’m also really angry that I neglected my best friends for this person and there’s a consequence I never feel like I have to make amends to my other friends because I push them aside for this person. And that also makes me feel really sad!
But you know what the really stupid thing is that if they called me right now I’d probably still speak to them!