I’ve spent most of my life running away from myself. If that sounds familiar then sooner or later you have to sit yourself down and have a good conversation with yourself.
The alternative is you slowly hate yourself more and more every day and that hate will eventually kill you a little bit more inside every day. That is either until you hurt yourself or isolate yourself from everything and everyone.
Have that conversation sooner rather than later and be happy with what you are and not what you think you should be.
It took me 48 years of my life to have that conversation and I can truly say, I am now the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. Firstly because I admit what I am and secondly because having done the first I am at peace with myself.
You can’t run away from yourself. You can’t as you have to live with yourself each and every day.
Sure you can numb your thoughts with drugs or drink but one day you’ll sober up and realise you’re still there.
Seek help, seek your true self, even if you might not like it, and be happy with yourself.
You cant find true happiness through others, only inner peace will bring true happiness.