To pee or not to pee that is the question? What do you do as a trans person when you need the toilet?

As a transwoman, I will always take the option of the female toilets over the male as outwardly I am female. For nearly 2 years I have lived my life as a female and therefore going into the male toilets is a backwards step IMHO.

However, there is an issue here that those seeking to affect change see us (transpeople) as some kind of sexual predator who shouldn’t be allowed to use public restrooms. This is and never has been the case for myself and all my trans friends. I just want to pee!

So, I have four choices when using the toilet in public places.

1. Use the women’s toilet and there maybe the potential to be shouted at. I have been verbally abused, by the older genereration.

2. Use the men’s toilet and risk having the shit kicked out if me. I have been physically threatened in a male toilet.

3. Use the disabled toilet if available. Easiest option.

4. Don’t pee! If you’ve got to go you need to go.


Whats prompted me to write this is the current rhetoric in the press and some extent in government to ban trans people from using the bathroom unless it is the bathroom they were assigned at birth. I’ve watched this move in the press/government for a while now and because of this rhetoric, I just don’t visit many places which don’t have unisex toilets as I have been abused in them in the past.

I have also written to my MP to put across my point of view and beg others to also do the same as the lobbyists are shouting very loudly at present.

https://www.gov.uk/government/consultations/toilet-provision-for-men-and-women-call-for-evidence/toilet-provision-for-men-and-women-call-for-evidence

So getting back to my point, to pee or not to pee, where to do it is the question?

Well I havent been in a mens toilet in a public place now since November 2019 and never will again. Outwardly I present as a female. I am on the pathway to gender re-assignment and I live my life as a woman. I know some people might say “Yes but genetically you’re still a man”. This maybe true but I share 50% of my DNA with a Banana, but that doesnt mean I am a Banana!!

I generally gravitate now to places with Unisex toilets as this removes the “What if” element of going to the toilet but otherwise, the women’s toilet all the way. The need to pee needs to be placated when I need to pee.

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Mikki Tiamo

Welcome to Mikki's profile on Mikki's website.

I am Mikki Tiamo and this page is just some of the articles, posts and gripes I have written.

Hope you like them and if you don't, C'est La Vie!